1 Kings chapter 19 reminds me how weak we are on our own. The chapter begins, King Ahab told his wife Jezebel”everything Elijah had done” including killing all the false prophets. Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me… if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them”. “Elijah was afraid and ran for his life… he left his servant there, while he himself went a day’s journey into the desert“. He sat down and said, “I have had enough, Lord“. Elijah has just been a participant in a miraculous demonstration of God’s authority. He stood before the king, the false prophets and the entire nation of Israel representing God, and then suddenly the threat from one woman caused him to retreat into the wilderness in despair. What changed? Like the apostle Peter getting out of the boat to walk on the water, once he took his eyes off the Lord and focused on the waves around him, he began to doubt, “beginning to sink he cried out, saying, ‘Lord, save me!’” (Matthew 14:30).
Elijah dealt with his raw emotion like a typical male, “Then he lay down under the tree and fell asleep“. Interestingly we read that twice, the angel of the Lord touched him and said, “Get up and eat“. We are of little use spiritually when we are physically drained. After being refreshed by the angel of the Lord, Elijah “traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God“. God revealed Himself to Elijah on the same mountain where God originally revealed Himself to Moses. Elijah heard the mighty wind tear the mountain apart, then felt the earthquake shake the mountain and finally he saw the fire. The Lord was not in the wind or the earthquake or the fire, but “after the fire came a gentle whisper“. I once heard someone describe “mommy ears”, the phenomenon where a mom can pick out her child’s cry even through the noise of activity. It seems Elijah had to be taught to listen for God’s voice. After this experience, God asked the same question and Elijah answered the same way as he had earlier. “What are you doing here, Elijah?” “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, broken down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.” I wonder if this time, Elijah heard his own emphasis on “I” and “me”? It is so easy to get discouraged when we focus on ourselves.
Elijah is finally prepared to do God’s work. “Anoint Hazael king over Aram. Also, anoint Jehu son of Nimshi king over Israel, and anoint Elisha… to succeed you as prophet“. And God gave Elijah an encouragement, “Yet I reserve seven thousand in Israel all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal“. I believe that every pastor, parent or person of faith has had their “Elijah moment”; alone in our discouragement and doubt, not certain if we can go on. Friend, on our own we are not worthy. God does not choose us because we are worthy. 2 Corinthians 9:8 reminds us, “God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work“. You are not alone.